This story happened awhile ago, maybe back in August. I felt and I've been feeling for awhile now that it's a story I should share. Let me begin by saying that as much as we'd all like to stay on top of the mountain, God allows us to be brought down to be tested. Sometimes we pass the test and in turn become stronger in our walks and closer to God. Sometimes, however, we fail. This is a story of failure.
Do you know the long-term sin that you struggle with? The one that has caused you to find yourself asking for forgiveness over and over and over again until you are sickened by your own struggle? Well, I had a sin like this. It had a control over me for most of my life. However, God did not abandon me in this sin. He constantly called me to repentence and confession. The repentence part was easy. The confession part was not. And so, it took years before I stopped allowing fear to keep me from freedom. But I did. I confessed my secret sin. And not just to God. I confessed in front of a group of 20 people in my Bible study. Talk about all-in. Then the most amazing thing happened. The control and the desire left. Oh, it reared it's ugly head a few times after, but each time it was longer and longer stretches in between until it was no longer a part of my life.
And so began this hill-like climb towards Christ. You know how every now and then you find yourself between hills? Not necessarily in a valley (I find that I am closest to God at the extremes), but at a neutral midpoint. A place of no great challenges and likewise no great epiphanies. This is where I find the enemy lurking...when my defenses are down because I'm either tired from struggling through a valley or else underwhelmed after descending from a peak.
I found myself last August or so in such a place. And, to my great horror I fell back into the sin I'd long since left behind. This is a bitter moment...when you find you are not as strong as you thought you were. Immediately, two old friends I hadn't seen in quite awhile came rushing into my life: guilt and shame. And they were holding nothing back this time. I found myself in a pit of depression and self-loathing. A prayer in my journal during that time reads, "God, how can I get up and worship in front of others? I don't want to be sorry, I want to be repentent. Don't let me be excluded from You because of my sin. Forgive me. Have mercy on me."
I knew in my mind that God would forgive me. I wrestled with trying to receive His forgiveness and grace. But all the while I lived under the impression that I would have to start over again at the bottom. I'd have to work for years before I would ever be as close to God again, I thought. Maybe this would be the straw that broke the camel's back. Maybe I'd be excluded from my destiny for failing so miserably.
Everytime I went to God in prayer I could hear nothing from Him except confess. I reasoned with Him that I couldn't confess because other people would no longer trust me or listen to me. I weakly offered to confess to Him. For about 3 weeks I lived in this hell. Serving in church and pretending that I was doing just fine. Finally, I decided it would be too hard to confess. Besides, I'd had a couple of repentent cry-fests. I thought that I had better get a start on working to get back into God's good graces. The day that I made this decision, I got a text from my good friend Justine. Is everything ok? I can't get you off of my heart. I looked at the phone and felt like I was going to throw up. God told on me! He sold me out! I knew that I would have to tell her. The pretense was too hard. I knew it couldn't last long enough...she knew me too well.
I finished teaching, and the minute school got out I got in my car to drive to Havasu. I had some things to buy, and some confessing and soul searching to do, and I didn't want to be around my family. As soon as I got on the road, Justine called. I pulled the car over, and between sobs I confessed everything. I wish I could say I felt better, but in truth it felt awful to reveal my sinfulness. I waited for Godly words of wisdom from her. She confessed that she had been there before with her own sin struggle (though I knew it had been a long time) and she admitted that she didn't really know what to say.
I got back on the road as we hemmed and hawed and tried to talk through it. The signal cut out, and secretly I was thankful for the reprieve. I bawled all the way up to Havasu feeling about as low as a person can. Wasn't I supposed to feel better? Wasn't confessin what God had asked me to do? I waited for the refief from my guilt and shame, but it didn't come.
I made it through the city and was almost to the mall when I heard and felt my front tire blow. You must be joking, I thought. My car limped into the driveway of a car dealership. I got out and assessed the damage. I knew I had a spare tire, but I had no idea how to get it out from under my car. I knew how to change a tire...in theory. I hoped that if I only got it started, some man would see my plight and come to the rescue.
I had a phone held to my face by my shoulder with my sister on the line (tire-changing expert), the instruction manual out, and some tool that was supposed to help me get the tire out. Only, couldn't seem to locate the dang hole to put the tool in. Seriously God? As if I wasn't suffering enough? I managed to find the hole under the floor mat beneathe a rubber stopper. Clearly engineering genius at work. I cranked the tire out only to find that I couldn't seem to detach it from the cable. I wrestled with this heavy tire (in my dress clothes, I might add). It was over 100 degrees in Lake Havasu in the summer. My hair was becoming matted to my face from the sweat. The more I wrestled, the dirtier I got. The dirtier I got, the angrier I got. Meanwhile, cars are zipping past me, not a single good samaritan among them.
Somehow, I finally figured out that you have to turn the cable sideways to slip it through the hole. Now I had the work of trying to put the jack in to lift up the car. More wrestling. More dirt and grime. Angrier still. I was still determined to beat that stupid flat tire. I got the jack in place and pumped the jack until the car was up. Now came the hard part (as if everything up to that point was simple). I had to figure out a way to lift this 80 pound tire up onto the axel. (Note: I have no idea how much tires actually weight. It definitely felt like 80 lbs of dead weight). I can't tell you how long I struggled and how dirty I got, with no success. Finally with angry tears, I cried out, "God, I need You help!"
Not a minute later a man who was leaving the dealership pulled up alongside me. He smiled knowingly. "Need some help?" he asked me. "Yes, please!" came my desperate reply. The gentleman was about 40 years old. He climbed out of his car and took the tire from me. "Let me take this," he said. "I'll handle all of this. Get up and go inside and wash yourself off." Grateful, I walked inside the dealership looking very disheveled. I came back out after cleaning up. "Is there some way I can help?" I asked. He smiled and said, "Just talk with me while I work."
This man then proceeded to tell me his testimony. He began to tell me about how his marriage was on the rocks and his relationship with his kids was bad, when a friend of his told him about Christ. He began to go to church, and eventually saw God redeem the broken pieces of his life. "I am a better father than I ever was, and now my wife and I are more in love than ever," he beamed.
He then began to share the Gospel with me, and I waited patiently, smiling to myself. In the end, I told him that I was a Christian. This did not convince or deter him. Then he began to talk to me about holy living and a life of total abandonment to Christ. I thanked him profusely for everything and he was on his way. Thankfully, so was I.
I called Justine back and told her the whole story. "Isn't that funny?" I marveled. "Amy," she said knowingly, "Don't you see what God is trying to tell you?" I paused, baffled. "What?" I asked incredulously. "Amy, you had a blowout. And you tried to fix it by yourself, but the more you tried, the dirtier you got, and the angrier you got. But when you finally gave up and asked for God's help, He immediately came to your rescue. And the first thing that He said to you was, 'Let me take this. I'll handle all of this. Get up and wash yourself off.' Then, when you asked him what you could do to help, he said, 'just talk with me while I work.'"
I couldn't even reply because I was overcome with the feeling of God's grace. All my guilt and shame melted away and I just felt loved. Not because of my efforts. Just because of who He is, and who He says I am. I understand what God's grace looks like. It looks like giving up and letting yourself be rescued.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
God is the author of the coolest stories
It's been awhile since my last update, but I just had to share this story. Last time we went to the jail we asked for the women first as always. We knew God was up to something when we got the men first, as that has never happened. Rick and a former inmate Victor witnessed to the Spanish inmates, and my mom and I took the remaning 6. Fran had been the week prior and asked me to share a Bible verse from Galatians with this guy named Byron. She was worried about him. 2 minutes in, and this guy piped up and said, "I was talking last week to this lady named Fran. She asked me if I wanted to accept Jesus and I told her I wasn't ready. Well, I've been reading the Bible and praying, and I'm ready now." Already off to a great start. You know it's gonna' be a good day when someone opens with that. So I asked him a bunch of questions and explained the gospel to make sure that he undrstood the decision he was making. He didn't want to be baptized in the jail at first because he was holding out for the river. But as soon as I told him that he could be baptized twice he was on board.
After the men left, we had the women. My mom and I had 3 women: 2 who come all the time and know Jesus already, and one who they dragged there named Michel (pronounced Mi-kel) who didn't know where she stood with God. She is a PK so she knows the basics, but didn't feel she "qualified" for heaven. I decided to share my testimony, which I haven't done in awhile. The Holy Spirit hit them all at the same time, and at a point in my story where I wasn't expectng tears. It was at a point that was hopeful. It seemed the idea of hoping was what rally stirred them. All at once all three of them were crying. The PK began to get really emotional as she began to explain that she felt she wanted to accept Christ and that she was ready, but was afraid. She explained that her husband was not a Christian and he was addicted to drugs. "I'm so afraid that if I become a Christian, he won't. I just know that he'll leave me," she explained. It was heart-wrenching. I could literally feel this woman's agony. She admitted that it was a lousy excuse, but that the fear was too great. I could tell by the way the other women reacted that this was a deep-rooted and long discussed topic. "He's even in jail right now. We got arrested together," she sobbed. I reached over and took her hand. I asked her what her husband's name was, thinking that I should begin to pray for him. "Byron," she replied. Instantly, my eyes filled with tears. I reached out and touched her hand and said, "Your husband just accepted Christ 30 minutes ago." This woman began to wail so loudly that Pastor Rick turned around and said, "Look, we're having trouble hearing each other talk over here." All of us were crying at this point. I asked her if there was anything that would keep her from accepting Christ, and she laughed through her tears and said, "I guess not!" I led her through the sinner's prayer as she echoed in barely a whisper, her emotions choking out her voice.
A few minutes later it was time to leave. Before we left, she asked us if we knew where in the Bible she could find that verse about enlarging your territory. None of us could locate it, though we searched through our extensive concordances. Her brand new Bible in hand, she opened her Bible at random, and landed on the exact page with the verse she was looking for. I looked at her and smiled. "Do you think God is trying to get your attention?"
It was such a fun Holy Spirit appointment, that obviously wouldn't have been possible had we not seen the men first. Michel was transferred less than a week later, before we had a chance to see her again.
Byron on the other hand, is still there every week, with Bible in hand, thirsty for more.
After the men left, we had the women. My mom and I had 3 women: 2 who come all the time and know Jesus already, and one who they dragged there named Michel (pronounced Mi-kel) who didn't know where she stood with God. She is a PK so she knows the basics, but didn't feel she "qualified" for heaven. I decided to share my testimony, which I haven't done in awhile. The Holy Spirit hit them all at the same time, and at a point in my story where I wasn't expectng tears. It was at a point that was hopeful. It seemed the idea of hoping was what rally stirred them. All at once all three of them were crying. The PK began to get really emotional as she began to explain that she felt she wanted to accept Christ and that she was ready, but was afraid. She explained that her husband was not a Christian and he was addicted to drugs. "I'm so afraid that if I become a Christian, he won't. I just know that he'll leave me," she explained. It was heart-wrenching. I could literally feel this woman's agony. She admitted that it was a lousy excuse, but that the fear was too great. I could tell by the way the other women reacted that this was a deep-rooted and long discussed topic. "He's even in jail right now. We got arrested together," she sobbed. I reached over and took her hand. I asked her what her husband's name was, thinking that I should begin to pray for him. "Byron," she replied. Instantly, my eyes filled with tears. I reached out and touched her hand and said, "Your husband just accepted Christ 30 minutes ago." This woman began to wail so loudly that Pastor Rick turned around and said, "Look, we're having trouble hearing each other talk over here." All of us were crying at this point. I asked her if there was anything that would keep her from accepting Christ, and she laughed through her tears and said, "I guess not!" I led her through the sinner's prayer as she echoed in barely a whisper, her emotions choking out her voice.
A few minutes later it was time to leave. Before we left, she asked us if we knew where in the Bible she could find that verse about enlarging your territory. None of us could locate it, though we searched through our extensive concordances. Her brand new Bible in hand, she opened her Bible at random, and landed on the exact page with the verse she was looking for. I looked at her and smiled. "Do you think God is trying to get your attention?"
It was such a fun Holy Spirit appointment, that obviously wouldn't have been possible had we not seen the men first. Michel was transferred less than a week later, before we had a chance to see her again.
Byron on the other hand, is still there every week, with Bible in hand, thirsty for more.
Friday, August 20, 2010
Jail Ministry
So, after getting back from Brazil I got up in church and shared a couple testimonies from my trip. I think it probably made a few people uncomfortable, but others approached me and told me how much it encouraged them. Many didn't know God was doing things like that!
After church every Sunday, some of us go to the local jail and share Christ. This has always been the highlight of my week, as over 100 people have come to Christ through this ministry, and I've already seen the Holy Spirt moving there. For the women's session, normally we have 7-10 women. That particular Sunday only four women walked in. As they came in, I was asking the Lord to give me a word of knowledge. The phrase "urinary tract infection" popped into my head. They sat down and I began to speak. I spent the entire time sharing testimony after testimony about how the Lord moved and healed in Brazil. Each of the four women responded differently. One women cried with joy through my entire talk (it was about an hour). Another woman had a big smile on her face, and you could tell that she had no idea God did such wonderful things (she was a fairly new believer). Another woman looked slightly uncomfortable, and the last woman sat back with her arms crossed the entire time. It was clear that she didn't buy any of it.
As I finished talking, I admitted to them that the Lord had possibly given me a word of knowledge, but that I was still working on discerning my voice from His, but that I couldn't leave without trying it out. So I asked them if anyone had a urinary tract infection. No one said anything. I was just about to apologize to them, when the woman who'd had her arms crossed asked, "Is that when you try to go pee and can't go?" I told yes. She instantly burst into tears. We all gathered around her and I asked if we could pray for her. She told us that she also had metal in her knee and couldn't bend it.
We laid hands on her and began to pray. Immediately I began to twitch. After a moment I asked her if she was feeling anything. She said she felt searig heat in her abdomen and a sensation like something was leaving through the top of her head. We prayed for healing in her knee and asked for the metal to disappear. She got up and tried to bend it, but didn't see much improvement. We prayed again and she tried to bend it. This time I heard the other girls gasp. They said that was way more than she could bend it before. I asked her how much she was healed and she said 80%. That was where it topped off. She was balling the whole time. I asked her if she had received Christ as her Lord and Savior. She shook her head and said, "My sister's always tryin to get me to do that!" I asked her if she thought she was ready to do that, and she said yes. So we prayed right there and she gave her life to the Lord. God is so much fun!!
I repeated the same thing for the men's session (only to a much larger audience). I got another word of knowledge as they came in- hepatitis. I knew, however, that there was a good chance no one would admit to that one. Out of obedience, I gave the group the word at the end. No one responded. I waited for a long time, and no one ever came forward. I prayed for them anyway. They began to walk out of the room at the end of the session and a young kid approached me. He told me that as soon as I said the word "hepatitis" he felt electricity shoot through his body. I asked him if he had hepatitis. "I don't know..." he said. I laughed and said, "Well if you did, you don't anymore!"
A few Sundays later, at my pastor's request, the jail bought a horse trough and we baptized over 20 people.
After church every Sunday, some of us go to the local jail and share Christ. This has always been the highlight of my week, as over 100 people have come to Christ through this ministry, and I've already seen the Holy Spirt moving there. For the women's session, normally we have 7-10 women. That particular Sunday only four women walked in. As they came in, I was asking the Lord to give me a word of knowledge. The phrase "urinary tract infection" popped into my head. They sat down and I began to speak. I spent the entire time sharing testimony after testimony about how the Lord moved and healed in Brazil. Each of the four women responded differently. One women cried with joy through my entire talk (it was about an hour). Another woman had a big smile on her face, and you could tell that she had no idea God did such wonderful things (she was a fairly new believer). Another woman looked slightly uncomfortable, and the last woman sat back with her arms crossed the entire time. It was clear that she didn't buy any of it.
As I finished talking, I admitted to them that the Lord had possibly given me a word of knowledge, but that I was still working on discerning my voice from His, but that I couldn't leave without trying it out. So I asked them if anyone had a urinary tract infection. No one said anything. I was just about to apologize to them, when the woman who'd had her arms crossed asked, "Is that when you try to go pee and can't go?" I told yes. She instantly burst into tears. We all gathered around her and I asked if we could pray for her. She told us that she also had metal in her knee and couldn't bend it.
We laid hands on her and began to pray. Immediately I began to twitch. After a moment I asked her if she was feeling anything. She said she felt searig heat in her abdomen and a sensation like something was leaving through the top of her head. We prayed for healing in her knee and asked for the metal to disappear. She got up and tried to bend it, but didn't see much improvement. We prayed again and she tried to bend it. This time I heard the other girls gasp. They said that was way more than she could bend it before. I asked her how much she was healed and she said 80%. That was where it topped off. She was balling the whole time. I asked her if she had received Christ as her Lord and Savior. She shook her head and said, "My sister's always tryin to get me to do that!" I asked her if she thought she was ready to do that, and she said yes. So we prayed right there and she gave her life to the Lord. God is so much fun!!
I repeated the same thing for the men's session (only to a much larger audience). I got another word of knowledge as they came in- hepatitis. I knew, however, that there was a good chance no one would admit to that one. Out of obedience, I gave the group the word at the end. No one responded. I waited for a long time, and no one ever came forward. I prayed for them anyway. They began to walk out of the room at the end of the session and a young kid approached me. He told me that as soon as I said the word "hepatitis" he felt electricity shoot through his body. I asked him if he had hepatitis. "I don't know..." he said. I laughed and said, "Well if you did, you don't anymore!"
A few Sundays later, at my pastor's request, the jail bought a horse trough and we baptized over 20 people.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Plane Ride #2
So let me begin by mentioning that after the 1st plane ride, I got an awesome 24 hour layover in Chile at a 5 star hotel with free meals (isn't God fun?!). In the airport in Miami I had a ten hour layover, where I slept and killed time. The entire time I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit. I had a huge smile on my face and basically felt like I had a really good secret that I couldn't wait to share. A Mormon guy sat next to me for awhile and I got to tell him about the miracles in Brazil and have another theological discussion.
On this plane I sat next to an older married couple. I was hoping to have another discussion with them, so I asked them why they were in Miami and they told me all about their trip. They asked me the same question and I told them I was actually traveling from Brazil. They responded with, "That's neat," and politely put in their headphones.
I had nothing to do on this flight, as the in-flight movie was horrible and my ipod had died. I was freezing cold, but I kept praising God and thanking Him for my expereinces. His presence was still so tangible. About an hour later I began to get a burning pain in my left shoulder and neck. I quickly realized that it might be a word of knowledge for someone around me. However, the woman was still listening to music and the guy was sleeping. So I prayed that God would give me more information. I got a word that started with "car_ _ ". I didn't know what it was, only that it started with the sound "car..." I got the impression that it might be their last name or the name of a business that they owned, so I wrote it down. Underneathe it I wrote michael and son, as an example of how the "car" word could end. For example, it might be Carmichael or Carson.
At some point when he was awake and she pulled out her headphones we struck up a conversation. I said to them, "This might sound weird, but do either of you have a shoulder problem or a shoulder injury?" As I asked them this, I indicated the place on my left shoulder and neck. Very quickly she asked in a skeptical voice, "Why...?" I said, "Call it sympathy pains. My shoulder is killing me for no reason and I thought it might be for one of you two." She then explained to me that she was in a car accident 15 years prior and her shoulder had never quite healed completely. It still hurt her after all that time.
I told them all about Brazil and how God had healed so many people and how the pain had gotten was really a word of knowledge. I asked if I could pray for her shoulder and she said yes. So I put my hand on her shoulder and began to pray. The instant I began to pray I got so hot that I felt like I had a fever. The whole plane ride I had been freezing, and suddenly I had to begin peeling off the layers of blankets and sweaters I had on. She said after finished that her shoulder felt like it was on fire. I asked her to try to do something to see if it had been healed and she tried rolling her shoulder. Instantly she freaked out. She was so excited and said that it was 100% better. I wanted to ask about the other information, but didn't see the need, as she had already been healed. However, I was curious to see if they were right. I asked them their names and it turned out their last name was nowhere close. I asked them what they did for a living and she was a legal secretary or something, and he said he owned a bakery. I asked him what the name of his bakery was, and he said, "Karsch's." I got really excited and pulled out my journal to show them where I had written it down.
She looked over my shoulder and shouted (and I do mean shouted), "OH MY GOD SHE GOT MICHAEL!!! THAT'S MY SON RIGHT BEHIND US!!!" At this point she turned around and announced to Michael that I got his name, and the poor guy was so confused. I didn't realize it when I had written it down, but I wrote Michael and Son together under the word "car". I got to pray for the whole family. I asked them if they went to church and she said they were Catholic but never went to church except on holidays. I told them how I had prayed for God to sit me next to people He wanted to encounter, and that I believed they would be blessed by going to church. They just happen to live close to my good friend Justine's church (which is rockin' in the Spirit I might add). I'm not sure her husband was very into it, but it was obvious to me that the Lord had made a major impact on her.
I know that the Lord blessed these people, but again, I know it blessed me just as much if not more. God is such a wonderful multi-tasker...
On this plane I sat next to an older married couple. I was hoping to have another discussion with them, so I asked them why they were in Miami and they told me all about their trip. They asked me the same question and I told them I was actually traveling from Brazil. They responded with, "That's neat," and politely put in their headphones.
I had nothing to do on this flight, as the in-flight movie was horrible and my ipod had died. I was freezing cold, but I kept praising God and thanking Him for my expereinces. His presence was still so tangible. About an hour later I began to get a burning pain in my left shoulder and neck. I quickly realized that it might be a word of knowledge for someone around me. However, the woman was still listening to music and the guy was sleeping. So I prayed that God would give me more information. I got a word that started with "car_ _ ". I didn't know what it was, only that it started with the sound "car..." I got the impression that it might be their last name or the name of a business that they owned, so I wrote it down. Underneathe it I wrote michael and son, as an example of how the "car" word could end. For example, it might be Carmichael or Carson.
At some point when he was awake and she pulled out her headphones we struck up a conversation. I said to them, "This might sound weird, but do either of you have a shoulder problem or a shoulder injury?" As I asked them this, I indicated the place on my left shoulder and neck. Very quickly she asked in a skeptical voice, "Why...?" I said, "Call it sympathy pains. My shoulder is killing me for no reason and I thought it might be for one of you two." She then explained to me that she was in a car accident 15 years prior and her shoulder had never quite healed completely. It still hurt her after all that time.
I told them all about Brazil and how God had healed so many people and how the pain had gotten was really a word of knowledge. I asked if I could pray for her shoulder and she said yes. So I put my hand on her shoulder and began to pray. The instant I began to pray I got so hot that I felt like I had a fever. The whole plane ride I had been freezing, and suddenly I had to begin peeling off the layers of blankets and sweaters I had on. She said after finished that her shoulder felt like it was on fire. I asked her to try to do something to see if it had been healed and she tried rolling her shoulder. Instantly she freaked out. She was so excited and said that it was 100% better. I wanted to ask about the other information, but didn't see the need, as she had already been healed. However, I was curious to see if they were right. I asked them their names and it turned out their last name was nowhere close. I asked them what they did for a living and she was a legal secretary or something, and he said he owned a bakery. I asked him what the name of his bakery was, and he said, "Karsch's." I got really excited and pulled out my journal to show them where I had written it down.
She looked over my shoulder and shouted (and I do mean shouted), "OH MY GOD SHE GOT MICHAEL!!! THAT'S MY SON RIGHT BEHIND US!!!" At this point she turned around and announced to Michael that I got his name, and the poor guy was so confused. I didn't realize it when I had written it down, but I wrote Michael and Son together under the word "car". I got to pray for the whole family. I asked them if they went to church and she said they were Catholic but never went to church except on holidays. I told them how I had prayed for God to sit me next to people He wanted to encounter, and that I believed they would be blessed by going to church. They just happen to live close to my good friend Justine's church (which is rockin' in the Spirit I might add). I'm not sure her husband was very into it, but it was obvious to me that the Lord had made a major impact on her.
I know that the Lord blessed these people, but again, I know it blessed me just as much if not more. God is such a wonderful multi-tasker...
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Since YPI...
Ok, I realize I'm doing this blog out of order, but I am more anxious to write about what has happened since Youth Power Invasion (Curitiba, Brazil) than I am even about the things that took place while I was there. I had no idea that God was as interesting/amazing/fun as I have recently discovered. To give you some background incase you are reading this, and have no idea what YPI is all about, I went on a 2-week trip with over 200 Americans/Europeans to Brazil to connect with what the Holy Spirit is doing there. There is a revival happening there like no where else in the world. For the first week, we were trained in healing, prophecy, words of knowledge, impartation, and intercession. We also went with the speakers in groups to four different churches on four different nights. We saw all kinds of healings, manifestations, and miracles.
As amazing as it was, I was adamant in prayer that I needed to be able to bring it back with me to Parker, AZ. In fact, I told God that I wanted to see Him move on the plane. I told Him I wanted to get words of knowledge and see healing even on the plane. I had no idea when I asked for this, how much God was willing to bless that desire.
In my flight out of Sao Paulo to Santiago, Chile, I sat next to a man who was returning home to Chile. He didn't speak much English, but I speak Spanish well enough to get by, so we made small talk about what he had been doing in Brazil for awhile. Then he asked me why I was in Brazil. I smiled and began to tell him about YPI and all of the wonderful miracles and healings God did through me and around me. He waited for me to finish, and he said, "I don't believe that." I insisted that it was true, and began to explain more stories about words of knowledge and how God had shown me things about people I had never met. He sat back, crossed his arms and said, "Ok, show me what you've got." As you can imagine, I began to panic inside and stuttered and stammered as I tried to explain that I was new to all of this, and that I still didn't know exactly how it worked etc. He just sat back and waited. So I said, "Um, I think I need a minute to pray..." This is where I pulled out that secret prophet's prayer that Will Hart told us about, that goes something like this:
"Help me Jesus, help me Jesus, help me Jesus, help me Jesus, help me Jesus..."
I'd love to be able to tell you that I clearly heard the Lord speak to me about this man. However, I didn't hear anything or see anything. I could imagine things about him, but who wants to risk God's reputation on that? I could imagine that his wife was pregnant, that he is a hypochondriac but couldn't be sure that was from God. So I turned and explained to him that I was still working on telling the Lord's voice from my own, and I asked him to forgive me if any of the information was wrong. I remember wincing as I asked him if he was a hypochondriac, to which he responded with a surprised expression and a simple, "Actually, yes." I totally freaked out. "What???? Really????? Oh my gosh!!!!" Then I suddenly remembered that when I sat down next to him I got a sharp pain in my stomach. Ordinarily I never would have said anything and would have passed it off as hunger pains, however, I was feeling a little more bold at this point. So I asked him if he had a stomach problem. Again, he looked surprised as he told me he had gastritis. "Oh thank God!" I said, and then quickly added, "Not that you have gastritis, just that I was right."
I looked down at my journal where I had jotted down all of these things, and decided that the rest was too bold for me. Why ruin the good streak? Unbeknownst to me, he had been looking over my shoulder and pointed to something on my page. "What's THAT?" he asked. I began to hem and haw thinking that I had already blown it, when he added, "How did you know my wife is pregnant??" By this point I was totally freaking out and so excited I think I may have woken people up on the plane with my celebrating. Now I really had his attention. However, that wasn't all. "How did you know her name was Patricia?" he asked, freaking out himself at this point. Now I was confused more than excited. "What?" I asked. He pointed to my paper where, at the top of the page, just before getting on the plane, I had written down the name Patricia King. Someone I had been traveling with suggested I check out this speaker named Patricia King. It was the only other thing written on that page, and I had written 'wife pregnant' just underneath it. He started asking me questions like, "Is everything ok with my wife's pregnancy?" I'm like, "I don't know, I'm not a psychic, it's the Holy Spirit!"
So I asked if I could pray for his gastritis and hypochondria, and he of course said yes. He didn't feel any heat or tingling like others had expereinced, but as I prayed for him my right hand began to shake and my body began to twitch. He couldn't test out the healing on the plane, unfortunately, because he had taken medicine, but he assured me he would test it out when he got home. Come to find out, he believed in a god, but he thought all religions were the same. He began to ask me theological questions, and for the rest of the plane ride we went through the Bible and talked about all kinds of things. It seemed like he had more doubts than I could answer, but as the plane landed, he said, "You know, there's a pentacostal church in my city. Maybe I'll go and check it out."
I was so blessed by this plane ride. More than he'll ever know. It would have been awesome if that was all that happened on the way home. But it wasn't.
As amazing as it was, I was adamant in prayer that I needed to be able to bring it back with me to Parker, AZ. In fact, I told God that I wanted to see Him move on the plane. I told Him I wanted to get words of knowledge and see healing even on the plane. I had no idea when I asked for this, how much God was willing to bless that desire.
In my flight out of Sao Paulo to Santiago, Chile, I sat next to a man who was returning home to Chile. He didn't speak much English, but I speak Spanish well enough to get by, so we made small talk about what he had been doing in Brazil for awhile. Then he asked me why I was in Brazil. I smiled and began to tell him about YPI and all of the wonderful miracles and healings God did through me and around me. He waited for me to finish, and he said, "I don't believe that." I insisted that it was true, and began to explain more stories about words of knowledge and how God had shown me things about people I had never met. He sat back, crossed his arms and said, "Ok, show me what you've got." As you can imagine, I began to panic inside and stuttered and stammered as I tried to explain that I was new to all of this, and that I still didn't know exactly how it worked etc. He just sat back and waited. So I said, "Um, I think I need a minute to pray..." This is where I pulled out that secret prophet's prayer that Will Hart told us about, that goes something like this:
"Help me Jesus, help me Jesus, help me Jesus, help me Jesus, help me Jesus..."
I'd love to be able to tell you that I clearly heard the Lord speak to me about this man. However, I didn't hear anything or see anything. I could imagine things about him, but who wants to risk God's reputation on that? I could imagine that his wife was pregnant, that he is a hypochondriac but couldn't be sure that was from God. So I turned and explained to him that I was still working on telling the Lord's voice from my own, and I asked him to forgive me if any of the information was wrong. I remember wincing as I asked him if he was a hypochondriac, to which he responded with a surprised expression and a simple, "Actually, yes." I totally freaked out. "What???? Really????? Oh my gosh!!!!" Then I suddenly remembered that when I sat down next to him I got a sharp pain in my stomach. Ordinarily I never would have said anything and would have passed it off as hunger pains, however, I was feeling a little more bold at this point. So I asked him if he had a stomach problem. Again, he looked surprised as he told me he had gastritis. "Oh thank God!" I said, and then quickly added, "Not that you have gastritis, just that I was right."
I looked down at my journal where I had jotted down all of these things, and decided that the rest was too bold for me. Why ruin the good streak? Unbeknownst to me, he had been looking over my shoulder and pointed to something on my page. "What's THAT?" he asked. I began to hem and haw thinking that I had already blown it, when he added, "How did you know my wife is pregnant??" By this point I was totally freaking out and so excited I think I may have woken people up on the plane with my celebrating. Now I really had his attention. However, that wasn't all. "How did you know her name was Patricia?" he asked, freaking out himself at this point. Now I was confused more than excited. "What?" I asked. He pointed to my paper where, at the top of the page, just before getting on the plane, I had written down the name Patricia King. Someone I had been traveling with suggested I check out this speaker named Patricia King. It was the only other thing written on that page, and I had written 'wife pregnant' just underneath it. He started asking me questions like, "Is everything ok with my wife's pregnancy?" I'm like, "I don't know, I'm not a psychic, it's the Holy Spirit!"
So I asked if I could pray for his gastritis and hypochondria, and he of course said yes. He didn't feel any heat or tingling like others had expereinced, but as I prayed for him my right hand began to shake and my body began to twitch. He couldn't test out the healing on the plane, unfortunately, because he had taken medicine, but he assured me he would test it out when he got home. Come to find out, he believed in a god, but he thought all religions were the same. He began to ask me theological questions, and for the rest of the plane ride we went through the Bible and talked about all kinds of things. It seemed like he had more doubts than I could answer, but as the plane landed, he said, "You know, there's a pentacostal church in my city. Maybe I'll go and check it out."
I was so blessed by this plane ride. More than he'll ever know. It would have been awesome if that was all that happened on the way home. But it wasn't.
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